Hi Debra;  welcome to the group.  i am also new to it but am enjoying having someone to talk too.  My parents are old like yours and can’t care for themselves anymore.  I have 6 siblings but all have an excuse why they just can’t help.  My Dad is 85 and I’m sure he will out live me.  He has had 6 joints either fused or replaced.  Be assured he was nasty and demanding through everyone.  He is an old farmer.  His whole life he has done things when he wanted too and never had to answer to anyone.  He most definately does not plan on changing.  My Mom is 82, she is in heart failure and her kidneys are hanging on by a thread, literally.  She is confused and on Oxygen nightly and part of the day now.  We try to keep her from strangling her self on the tubing most days.  I do all the laundry, dusting, deep cleaning, home repairs ( my husband), cooking, baking, taxes, inspection of vehicles, medication box and take to all appointments.  Mom no longer can remember anything, so I am her memory.  Does any of this sound familiar?

I am new to this group.  I have just embarked on my first experience caring for my dad through a lung exacerbation flare up which was a 5 day hospital stay and I have had to remain with him when he returned home.  He has severe end stage COPD, a lung infection that was first thought to be cancer then TB which through testing it is not, but another form of a macro bacterium infection and possible congestive heart failure.  He is better but we have some big decisions as to whether he can truly stay by himself.  He lives alone  as I lost my mother 2 yrs ago.  My brother is unable to assist with care, so it is my responsibility.  I feel overwhelmed with the responsibility if knowing exactly how to proceed with keeping him safe and yet letting him remain independent.  Hoping this site might offer some insights.