JANE WOLF FRANCES, M.S.W., J.D.
Author of the new book: Parenting Our Parents: How to Transform this Remarkable Challenge into a Journey of Love.
Jane Wolf Frances has spent nearly four decades honing her skills as a problem-solver, applying her special brand of “listening” to the concerns presented by her clients. Graduating with honors from Wellesley College, Jane received her Juris Doctor law degree from Boston University. Later in life, she attended UCLA to receive her master’s degree in social work, becoming a licensed Psychotherapist.
Jane’s years of education reflect more than focused determination and scholarly discipline. They also afforded Jane a fascinating career with the Peace Corps and VISTA Volunteer programs; in anti-poverty law; as a Law Professor working with Dream Team attorney Gerald F. Uelmen; a “dealmaker” at 20th Century Fox and a part of some of the most fascinating cases of our day. Jane has also won awards volunteering her time at AIDS Project Los Angeles, running caregiver support groups and working to change unfair tax laws.
Jane now practices psychotherapy in her offices in southern California. For decades she’s counseled individuals and families to successfully resolve their biggest challenges – be they emotional loss, practical, relational or stage of life. Bringing the experience of teaching and practicing law to her work as a mental health professional and family coach, Jane feels privileged to have helped so many people live happier, healthier and saner lives. But she’s not been content to stop there…
Jane’s Experience with “Parenting Our Parents”
Like all of us, Jane is far more than her work. One Christmas traveling cross-country for a family visit, this only daughter discovered the truth about her aging parents. Jack and Lillian Wolf, then in their 80’s, had been concealing the depth of their neediness from her. They were in seriously ill health and their home was in shambles!
Jane recognized that she’d come upon a life-defining moment, that this could be her time to “give back” to the parents who’d given her life, an education and so much more. Choosing to reverse her former place as the child in the family, Jane found herself embracing a new role.
Little did she know then that PARENTING OUR PARENTS (or doing “POP,” as she soon called it) would last for ten years, require her to bring to bear all her educational and life resources, provide her the biggest challenge of her life or turn into her life mission. But all of that happened.
First Jane’s life became about helping her own parents live out theirs with grace and love by POParenting them. Then she turned to helping other families throughout the nation develop POP skills they would need and offering them the positive point of view that the POP years can be some of the best of our lives. Once POP began, neither Jane nor her parents were ever quite the same again. Neither will you be, should you take on doing POP for your loved ones.
About the Book
You can read Jane’s story in her new book, “PARENTING OUR PARENTS: How to Transform this Remarkable Challenge into a Journey of Love.” As Jane courageously reveals the realities of her family’s journey during the stage of life she’s called “the POPcycle,” you can learn more about effectively navigating your own family’s POPcycle.
You’ll find Jane’s book compelling reading as well as highly informative as a memoir/self-help/guide on HOW TO BE a loving parent to your aging loved ones.
If you’re parenting children, there are many excellent books available. But until now, there haven’t been any books on how to be a great parent to your own parents as they advance in age. We’ve had no guidance on how to begin “The Conversations” about our loved ones’ declining, needing us nor what they desire for their final days. Finally, there’s a book that offers you all that plus a vision of making this complicated time in your life a special one — the time to heal old wounds, make new bonds and create memories of POP as one of the greatest gifts to your family and your own peace of mind.
For more information on the book, CLICK HERE.
POP Family Coaching
It was also out of necessity that Jane became the first and Master POP Family Coach. She pioneered a national program when she saw how many people were desperate for specialized, customized guidance as they traversed this unique time in family life.
Next Jane developed a Certification Program so that POParents, perhaps you even, might contemplate becoming trained as POP Family Coach. By learning how to utilize this unique POP Family Coaching program, you can add to all you’ve already learned as a POParent! You can contribute your own POP experience and wisdom to significantly aid other families who like yours want to traverse their POPcycles as a journey of love!
For more information about doing POP FAMILY COACHING with Jane, CLICK HERE.
For more information about becoming a POP Family Coach (PFC), CLICK HERE.
In addition to her private practice, Jane still conducts a limited number of POP family coaching sessions whenever she can. Jane likes to offer these primarily via the Internet on Skype, a virtually free communications technology. This live audio/video hookup allows her to bring together as many interested family members as possible, however near or far-flung, in ongoing discussions about utilizing POPlans, having particularly difficult conversations and whatever else they may need.
Launching the POP Community
Jane has joyously launched her mission of love, reaching out to create a global POP community via the Internet! As that vision materializes, Jane is succeeding by giving you and others in the POP community, the support and safety net she so missed when her folks were alive and in need of POParenting. She hopes you will see this website as the “go-to” place for all things POP and for everyone involved in a POPcycle, now or in the future.
You will find your own experience of caring for your aging loved ones is dramatically transformed when you think differently about POP and what it can give you and everyone in your family. ParentingOurParents may feel like a huge responsibility with lots and lots of things to figure out, do, talk about and resolve — and it is. But watch what happens when you, your siblings and your senior parents begin to heal the wounds that people in your family have carried around for decades.
When you choose to thoughtfully take on the challenges of this unique time and opportunity, you’ll get to have life “do-overs,” finding moments of sweetness when you feared sadness and repaying your folks for all they did when you were young – and ever since.
“In all my years of doing this work, I’ve never met anyone who’s said they regretted doing POP and neither will you. You will hear your parents’ gratitude and pride as they relax into their final days or years, knowing that you will be there compassionately caring.
It’s inevitable that your life will be enriched and your heart ‘expanded’ during your family’s POPcycle. I promise: just like I was changed for the better, after you’ve done POP, you too will never quite be the same again.” -Jane Wolf Frances, M.S.W., J.D.