After the hangup logging in I’m not quite so excited to be here. But here I am.
I was excited, because I was getting help, I am reaching out and I’m here. Everyone including my own pops is suggesting I move out. But they all be like, don’t move too far away, wtf? Feel like I’m shamed and guilty for living with my pops, but I kinda refuse living in a hole for reasons of self-respect. And with all the blaming, passive-aggression, and nit-picking… I want to move two-states away so they don’t break me. I’m important, too!! And if that means a job, or a wife, well by-hell at least I’ll get a life out of the deal, right everyone?
My POPS is an able and socially active 75-year old. But guess why? Because he has the support of his invisible family. My brother’s and sister’s all want me close-by so I can’t rely upon them to find me a place. And Dad he knows he’s got a good deal in a miniature allowance for maintenance, maid, short-order cook, butler, and day-laborer. But he wants to get laid, and have a live-in cook.
It’ll obviously fall-apart if I move away, to a lesser or major way as one or two things at first niggling add up to dysfunction. He asked me what I did for him the last week one-time for my allowance, and I never stopped listing off the invisible things I did for him… from answering phonecalls to putting sand on the back step where it’s slippery on the way out to compost. I listed about 20 things I never got credit for. All he sees is me just sitting on my computer telling him I’m too busy to print out something or unmax his browser or email window.
Hey everyone I’m 40 years old and I’ve never published a poem in a journal. I gave up work and love to help POPs, and now am facing indenturetude in taking care of the same man that wants to kick me out for hating the Easter Bunny, so-to-speak. My pops is 75 years old has a social life that puts mine to shame, can’t keep a secret, and enjoys being tacky. How are all of you doing?
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